Back from London.....off to Newcastle!

Both myself and Andrew had a weeks holiday (have to use mine before I move job!) so we were down in London for a few days. We headed down last Friday on the train, along with my friend Claire and her boyfriend Giuseppe. We were staying the weekend with another friend and then me and Andrew were staying another few nights in a hotel. Over the weekend we visited Borough market, did the London bus tour, which was good and visited Tate Modern - for a taste of culture ;-) We also had a couple of lovely meals out and visited a comedy club - the first two acts were good, although we were not impressed with the main act. The London crowd were very polite...I'm sure in Glasgow some bottles may have been thrown! It was lovely catching up with my friends though, which was the main purpose of the trip, as well as celebrating my friends 30th birthday.

Andrew and myself then headed to our hotel, which was really nice, and four of our old flatmates from uni, who now all work in London, and their partners, came over for dinner that night. It was great catching up - I really miss them all as we did have a lot of fun at uni! We also managed to catch up with Corey for a long overdue catch up. The weather was a bit dodgy but we managed to visit Covent garden, the Tower of London and also fitted in some shopping, of course! After being accosted in the street with a buy one, buy one free ticket, we ended up on some London Bridge Experience - people dressed in period costume explaining the history, then a kind of London dungeon experience. Basically walking through dark corridors, with strobe lighting, heads hanging from the ceiling and people in costume jumping out. Now normally I am a very jumpy person and fully expected to squeal my way to the finish however the lady in front of me started totally freaking out and I thought she was going to have a panic attach. Being a psychiatrist I couldn't really help myself and ended up pacifying her all the way round. I had to lead the whole group, opening doors ahead of this lady so I could tell her what to expect and reassuring her all the time. In the end I was so NOT scared...maybe I should have asked for my money back :-)

I forgot my camera but Claire said I could use some of her pics..

On London Bridge

Stopping for some lunch from Borough Market

Me and Claire with the invisible man!

Borough Market

Tower bridge going up - see the road markings?!

The most amusing, albeit very embarrassing story, occurred on the journey home. It involves a toilet and a bare bottom. The train had one of those new fancy toilets - you press an electronic button and this curved metal door slowly opens. Once inside you press one big button to close the door and another to lock it - the lock button flashes continuously to tell you the door is indeed locked. So I follow all these instructions, use the toilet and stand up.....with jeans around ankles. I then think it's getting a bit drafty before realise in horror that the curved metal door is very slowly opening to reveal a very surprised lady on the other side. It happened in slow motion - the door slowly opening - and the fact it wont respond to the close button until it has damn well finished opening. The lady on the other side very helpfully hid to the side of the door - but unfortunately we had also just pulled in at a platform so I am not certain of the exact number of people to view my little derriere. At least it's quite a small derriere and not too distressing to view (in my opinion). I would rather not display it mind you. I had to wait for what seemed like hours before the door would start closing again - but sadly the damage was done! Never shall I use the toilets on a train again.

On a less traumatic note, since we got home we have taken Seb on quite a few off lead walks and he is definitely getting bolder! He like to run ahead until he can't see us...then I know he is just waiting to be called so he can get a treat. Not daft! I have also been teaching him to walk to heel off lead and he is doing really well. Yesterday we had to pass two other dogs straining on their leads to get to Seb. At first he tried to run over but when I called him and told him to walk to heel he did it! The other dog owners were really impressed - I was largely just surprised but pretended as if Seb is always this well behaved:-)

I have routine transplant clinic in Newcastle on Tuesday morning and then I am having another endoscopy in the afternoon at a different hospital. This is a follow up on the surgery I had in January because I have still been getting abdominal pain when walking (which only started after the surgery). I don't really expect them to find anything but just have to go through the process. We will probably have to stay at mums friend on Tuesday as I will have been sedated so maybe not in state for getting home that night. I will update my blog with results as soon as I get the chance.

Leave you with a pic of my bedding plants..

May

June

July (think I put too many plants in one container, lol?!)

Resting...a bit

I had a less physically challenging weekend - I decided I would do nothing in the garden and give my wee body a rest! I have been really tired, to the point I have randomly fallen asleep during the day, which I have never done (even when really unwell pre transplant). I think it might be the new drug for sinuses but it seems to be helping a bit so I am trying to persevere. These side effects should start to wear off after a while. I was however worried that it was a sign I was trying to fight off a virus as my temperature was also flickering a little. However this has now settled and I feel otherwise well so all seems to be on track.

I went to see Singing in the Rain musical in Edinburgh. It was very good and I really enjoyed it. I only knew two songs however so I missed that feeling of singing along (very quietly ;-) but it was still a lovely night out. Yesterday we went shopping because I was having a crisis of confidence. Since I had this operation in January my stomach swells up during the day. It looks ok-ish in the morning then by evening I can look 6 months pregnant. No kidding! I know people will say, oh but you are slim and it's ok.....but the fact I am otherwise slim makes it more noticeable (to me anyway!) I was struggling to find a top to wear on Saturday night so decided I would see if there was anything in the sales. I managed to get a few tops in New Look sale (oh I love their sale - you can get about 5 things for £20!) I could not think of a reason that little patent purple shoes would make the stomach issue better but I bought them anyway. To be fair everyone needs some purple patents shoes :-)

We have had Seb out for a few more walks off lead and he is loving it! There is a grassy, hilly route nearby that takes you several miles up to the country park but you can just do a circular route or turn back. So I have been taking Seb up there and he has been so good. He has still come back on every recall and been very good meeting other dogs. He doesn't go too far away and is always looking back to make sure we are still there. He was hilarious last night when I let him off - he bombed off at high speed then as we passed a wooden bench he jumped on at one end, ran along and jumped off then kept running - like he thought we were on an obstacle course! I reckon he would be good at agility....must look into that! I will have to get some pictures but for now I will leave you with some of Seb in the garden..

Chilling out on top of the recycling box

Something has caught his attention

Squirrel chase!

Hiding amongst some rubble bags
(I told him it was bed time - he ran outside and hid, only popping out for a photo!)

Overdue Blog!

It's been a busy week at work because the consultant is on holiday for 2 weeks and the Staff Grade doctor phoned in sick with possible Swine flu....eek! I have been a bit worried but reckon if I had caught it last week I would have had symptoms by now. Might be impossible to avoid it really but hoping I can do so long enough to get the new vaccine they have developed (being immunosuppressed makes it more risky for me to catch it). So it's been a little bit manic at work and I have left late everyday - just trying to deal with all issues arising. However I am not back at work until next week now so they will have to cope without me haha :-)

Last weekend we were super busy in the garden - the forecast said rain all weekend but it didn't happen in the end so we just got as much done as possible. It's the first time in ages we haven't had something or other to do at the weekend, so that was nice in itself. I perhaps overdid it slightly though - I put up trellising for the honey suckle and clematis plants - this was quite successful other than the whole 6ft panel falling on my head as I tried to secure the bottom and it came off the nails at the top. Comedy moment! I actually also had another classic comedy moment when I stood on the bottom of the rake and it pinged forward and hit my head. Andrew seemed more amused than concerned I must say! I then cut the front grass before insisting on having a go at using the strimmer. It's a petrol strimmer which is rather large - in fact you could safely call it 'a beast'. Andrew had to start it since it involves some complicated procedure of turning dials to give it choke and pulling on the cord thingy until it starts - I then tried to hold it - it was heavy! I managed about half the lawn before giving up, which was quite good going. My arms however are now covered with bruises where it was resting on my arm - and my knees are covered in bruises from kneeling in the garden (stupid steroids). I also planted lots of alpines and heathers in the rockery. Now it's been established a year I have a better idea of what is growing and where needs filling in. Unfortunately we have 2 large trees in the rockery - one is dead and has been taken down but the roots are still everywhere, so it can be really tricky to find a good spot for new plants. Meanwhile Andrew managed to get a lot more digging done where we want to lift the lawn at the side and put down chips. A very productive, but tiring weekend!

Seb is still getting on great with the dog walker and in fact was away for 3-4 hours today because they went up to Loch Lomond. He is lying flat out now! We also had him off lead again - where it was quite busy and other dogs were there. It was a route in the country park which is more off the main routes but busy enough - well away from any roads though. He was very good! He sometimes trotted beside us then would get caught up with a smell and we would keep walking - he would then see we were ahead and would run at top speed until he caught up again. He met quite a few dogs and was very good at approaching them slowly, having a sniff and walking off again. He did meet one dog who seemed to want to play - but Seb didn't. I was shouting Seb and he was trying to come but the dog wouldn't let him past! The owner was just sitting on a bench watching and saying nothing. Eventually Seb got past but he seemed a bit stressed out and stayed by our side after that. He was really good at coming when called though - I would give him a treat and then tell him 'off you go' and he would dive off at high speed so excited! Hopefully we will be able to do that more often as it is much more stimulating and tires him out more.

I am already starting to feel nervous about my new job, which I should start on 17th August. It will be very different to my current job with regards the kind of patients and illnesses I deal with. Although both jobs are in Psychiatry, old age is quite different and deals a lot more with illnesses such as dementia, and also depression etc in older people. General adult psychiatry looks after a lot more patients with psychotic illnesses such as schizophrenia, and also mood disorders (depression, bipolar) and personality disorders. I am going to start some reading to brush up on my knowledge and skills. I am sure I will be fine and I would be a bit strange if I wasn't a bit nervous. Interestingly as I am typing about this I am wondering what people's perceptions/understandings are of illnesses such as schizophrenia.....maybe I should do an educational post some time :-)

On the medical front - I think the new tablets are starting to help but I am still trying to get them up to full dose without making myself feel too spaced out. I am definitely tolerating them better and I am sure I have taken significantly of my other pain killers this week. In fact I have more taken them for my sore hip than for the sinuses......fingers crossed we are onto a winner here.

I will leave you with some garden pictures:

Potatoes! In case of famine.

Tiny tomatoes!

Veg bed with carrots at front, parsnips at back (we think!)

Other veg bed with peas at back, various lettuce in middle and onions at front

One of my hanging baskets - violas I grew from seed. I clearly didn't understand how many would grow and have managed to cram far too many into one basket! You live and learn :-)

Planter with geraniums and pansies grown from seed

A lovely lily we have in the garden

Andrews basil factory. We will be eating a lot of pesto I think....

I got the job!

I had my job interview this morning and late this afternoon they called to offer me the position :-) It is a part time post - 20hrs/week - in general adult psychiatry as a Speciality Doctor (used to be called Staff Grade) which is a promoted post from what I am doing just now. I will be starting mid August when my current job is due to end. In the past these staff grade posts did not allow you to continue training but now some of the posts offer training opportunities, which this one does. This keeps my options open for progressing to consultancy should I wish or I can also continue to progress along this route. The big advantage of staying a Speciality Doctor is that it generally does not involve on call, less managerial/admin type work - so essentially most of the time can be spent actually seeing patients, which is what I enjoy doing. I think 20hrs is ideal at the moment - it is a bit more than I currently have but is not putting too much pressure on me and also allow me to continue doing some work at the uni. And also maybe trying to have a life somewhere in there too!

My sinuses are still driving me mad but I am really hoping the new tablet works. I started taking it on Saturday and felt a bit spaced out but not too bad. I then took my next dose on Sunday - fell asleep three times during the day, became really uncoordinated and clumsy (well, more than my normal!) and felt very strange indeed. I could not have driven the car or gone to work like that. I phoned the GP yesterday and she felt the regime I had been given for titrating up the dose was a bit OTT for a tiny person with slightly dodgy kidney function. So I have some lower dose tablets and will build it up a lot more slowly - I took the first one tonight (not wanting to take it before the interview) and so far I feel ok. I don't expect much pain relief until the dose is a bit higher so fingers crossed :-)

We also had a monumental event at the weekend - Seb was allowed off his lead!!! We have been practising recall with him attached to 30m washing line and he is really good. So we took him to the country park where there is some moorland - with no roads nearby at all. At first he didn't seem to realise he wasn't on a lead and kept following me but then he got more adventurous and started exploring. Towards the end he had found a gate which he was trying to squeeze under but he did come back when I shouted (with chicken reward of course). I would still never let him off where there are any roads as he is rather unpredictable but this was a huge step forward!

Also at the weekend we went through to Edinburgh and did a radio interview with my uncle. He hosts a few religious radio shows and wanted to interview myself and Andrew for one of his shows called 'A view from Earth'. It was to talk about my earlier life with CF, the transplant, the journey.. basically my life story. Led by questions I was talking for nearly an hour with Andrew getting a word in now and again ;-) I did manage to get some information in about Live Life Then Give Life and also spoke about organ donation and the need for people to sign the register, but more importantly, to let their family know their wishes. I am not sure when it will be aired but will let you know when I hear.

Lastly, if you haven't noticed, Team Jac has gone over the £20, 000!! In fact over £21,000 from today. I have a few more people to chase for their sponsorship so we are nearly there now. With gift aid added we are closing in on £25, 000. Truly amazing.

A bit of a moan

I might just have a small whinge if no one minds! My sinuses are driving me up the wall again - they have been so sore this week and nothing is really helping. Coincidently I had appointment with pain doctor on Thursday so he has added in another drug (gabapentin) so I am really hoping this will have some benefit. Also this week my joints have been pretty bad - in particular my hip is really stiff and sore. I have been somewhat(!) irritable all week because I feel like I just have pain all the time but I know that things will eventually settle a bit. It's just so frustrating at time - because I just want to be normal!! Anyway that is my whinge over.

Other news is that I have a job interview next week - it is for a part time post in general adult psychiatry, starting in August (I have mentioned before that the funding for my current post runs out in August). I have been trying to do some background reading and preparation this week but it's hard to concentrate when face is sore! I have managed to do quite a bit though and have another few days, so hopefully I will come across well enough in the interview. Think good thoughts for me!

I had my hair cut yesterday - it is driving me nuts at the moment. I think I mentioned it was falling out and although it seems to have stopped now it is definitely the thinnest it's ever been. The new hair is growing in underneath which makes the rest stick out a bit and it's all wispy and weird at the ends. The best the hairdresser could do was to cut a few inches off to try and make it thicker, but she said I will just have to wait until the new hair grows longer and it will hopefully be fine again. I am mostly wearing it tied back which looks ok, so hopefully it won't take too long to sort itself out!

I will leave you with some pictures of Seb. This was him trying to get Andrews attention because he wanted to go for a walk...


Firstly he clambered on top of Andrew - note the paw on Andrew's arm. Seb uses his paws a lot to get attention (he also uses them to push over ornaments etc when seeking attention!)


This didn't work, so he climbed behind Andrew's legs and began to sulk..



Looking across at me with his sulky face..







We ignored the sulk, so he then popped up again...


Then sat like this just staring at Andrew intently...


Andrew did give in and take him for a walk haha!

Seb in his new favourite lookout!

Back Home!

We had a lovely weeks holiday in Nice and I am only sorry it is all over so soon! The weather was great all week - about 25c max - which was not too hot for walking around sight seeing. I am not so good at the relaxation part and did have Andrew traipsing all over the place and getting on and off buses to random places. For me that is relaxing though - I enjoy seeing new things and love to explore places I go on holiday. We did spend a little time at the pool - more so in the early evening just having a coffee and reading my book. It has to be at least 30c before I get in a swimming pool but Andrew does like a swim. I get really cold very quickly in the water and am not a very strong swimmer. I can only do the front crawl and it is very splishy splashy!!

View over Nice from hill where Castle used to be

Nice itself was a lovely place - very Italian feeling about it, as it is near the border (lots of pizza and pasta on the menus!) The old part of the town is beautiful - lots of tiny winding streets with interesting shops and cafes. I love stopping for a coffee and sitting watching people go by - and the French do proper coffee :-) The beach in Nice is pebbly so not great for sunbathing although it was very busy all the same. There is a long promenade based on the English style (designed when Nice was a destination for wealthy Brits) - it stretched for miles along the coast.

The little train at the promenade - takes you around Nice

Breakfast sitting outside the cafe (don't worry, half of that is mine!)

Cimiez district of Nice - this picture was in the gardens of a monastery

We also visited a few other places along the riveria as our hotel was near the bus station and it was a euro no matter where you seemed to be going! We spent a day in Monaco - looking at the castle and watched the changing of the guards (although I couldn't see anything because I am so small). We walked along the waterside looking at all the big yachts and visited the casino(just the inside hall - you have to wear shirt and tie to get into casino itself). Monaco was an insight into the very rich - posh cars, posh shops and very expensive. I much preferred the more laid back feel to Nice.

Monaco

View over Monaco from the castle

Other places we visited were Grasse - where they have all the perfume factories and Eze, which is a little village perched on a hill. It was a steep climb but amazing place - tiny streets with shops in little caves in the stone. At the top were exotic gardens and an amazing view!

View from exotic gardens in Eze

View of a villa (now a museum) in Cap Ferrat which belonged to Baroness Rothschild

I just can't believe how much easier it was for me to move about although everything on the Riveria seeming to be uphill! But I was not out of breath once! The heat also did not bother me at all where as in the past it would have made my breathing very difficult. Unfortunately I did have a lot of problems with my hip - but I think its coming from my back when I hurt it before the walk as opposed to part of my CF arthritis pain. I am going to ask my physio if someone could take a look at my back because I am not sure what to do next. I did have to take a lot of painkillers to keep it in check and also had heat packs on it (not much fun in hot weather haha) but maybe some exercises would help things ease up. Despite the hip though it was still easier to get around than before the transplant and it made the whole trip so much more enjoyable.

It's back to reality now though and back to work tomorrow. I hear we are forecast some good weather this week though so perhaps I can just pretend I am still in Nice.....


p.s Just Giving appear to have changed their website when I was away, so there are problems with the counter I had before and also intermittent problems loading my page. I will manually update the total at the right hand side of the blog though so you can keep an eye on it - heading towards the 20K now!!!!!

Bon Voyage

Just a last catch up before we head off on holiday! Today was last day at work and tomorrow will be mad packing, organising and running errands. Oh joy! I had my morning planned out, which involved nail painting and other such frivolous activities, but then I got a phone call from GP to say I need my bloods rechecked at 9am tomorrow morning. Pah! Kidney function was slightly off again on Monday but I asked receptionist for the results and they sounded not bad to me so not sure what all the drama was about - best to get them checked before I go, although not much I can do about it now!

I have had quite a busy week - no more lunching out though ;-) It was Andrew's gran's 90th birthday on Tuesday so she had party which I think she thoroughly enjoyed. She is rather amazing for 90! I was also busy at work - it's that thing of trying to tie up all loose ends before you go on holiday so ended up leaving quite late today. At least I left with all work done.

I planted out all my bedding plants the other night - didn't want to leave them in the greenhouse when we were away (although someone is watering stuff for us). They were mostly very tiny so not sure if they will grow to much...or even survive, but it's all good fun anyway. I am not even sure what some of them are ;-)

Seb is really loving his dog walker! She had him out for nearly 3 hours the other day as she was meeting up with her mum who also walks dogs - so he was totally shattered but very happy. Sometimes when he is dreaming he makes little noises and moves his legs - that night he started wagging his tail in his sleep! I have never seen that before - he must have been dreaming about all the fun he had earlier. Today wasn't a dog walker day but when I got home he kept looking past me to see if anyone else was coming in the door! That dog has no sense of loyalty ...

On a final note the Team Jac total has now gone over £19,000!! I seriously think we will make 20k (and that is without gift aid). Will be amazing if we do! Maybe by the time I come back it will already be there :-)

Well, off to pack my factor 50 and sun hat now...

Lady who Lunches

I seem to be spending a lot of time being a lady who lunches - really need to work some more in order to pay for it all haha! I went into town last week with mum for some holiday shopping (for her, not me) and we met up with Andrew for lunch, as he is temporarily working in the city centre due to flooding at his workplace. I then had lunch at the country park with my friend Lucie, went through to Edinburgh to meet my friends for the afternoon yesterday and I am just getting ready to go into town and meet a friend this afternoon. I think that may be a bit excessive in one week - although to be fair I have been so busy the last few weeks that I have hardly had time to meet anyone!

Being away yesterday gave Andrew time to sort a few things in the garden - namely Seb proofing the vegetable beds. He has curved some chicken wire over the beds to prevent Seb running up and down them - it will be ok once the plants are larger but he has destroyed lots of seedlings. Well I was in the greenhouse last night and caught Seb taking the chicken wire in his mouth and trying to pull it up - presumably so he could crawl under! You really can't trust that dog. He wasn't very happy with me anyway because I did a really stupid thing last week. I left the key in the back door and the dog walker couldn't get in!!! They tried to phone me but I had my phone on silent because I was at work - and then to make matters worse I went off on a sandal hunting expedition all afternoon and didn't get home until tea time, by which time Seb was not a happy boy. Oops. I tried to make up for it by taking him to the country park on Thursday and up to Loch Lomond on Friday. I think he has just about forgiven me...

I was also helping with baby duties this week. My friend Lucie had an important meeting so I went along to look after her 6 week old baby, Reuben, while she was in the meeting. Well he cried, and cried and cried some more. Eventually I started singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star over and over while walking about jiggling him up and down ....and this seemed to help. I am the worst singer around (mum will confirm) so I was quite surprised. It could be that he thought by stopping crying I might stop singing :-) Amazing how much attention you get when you are carrying a very cute baby up and down - a bit like when Seb was a puppy - although not quite the same thing ;-)

I will leave you with some pics of Seb. I had stripped the bed and left the duvet on the floor....I later found Seb had made himself a wee bed.....

Better late than never!

I meant to update at the weekend but the weather was far too nice to be inside on the computer!! We have had something of a tropical heat wave the past few days and I have been loving it - last summer was so awful and I missed the only nice weather we had in spring when I was rather tied up getting a transplant. So I have been making the most of the sunshine while it lasts :-) I was wondering how I would cope with the heat because pre-transplant I found it made me very breathless, couldn't tolerate it for long, and would also often feel sick with a headache. This weekend however I felt absolutely fine - took Seb to the country park first thing, rushed around Tesco getting BBQ things, prepared all the meat and enjoyed the sun all afternoon without feeling unwell at all! Just as well because we have finally booked our summer holiday - a week in Nice in a lovely ( I hope!) hotel with a swimming pool - so we have option to visit places on the French Riveria but also can chill out and relax at the pool if we feel like it. I can't wait :-)

We also spent a lot of time in the garden catching up with bits and pieces. I have re-potted all my bedding plants and have been putting them outside during the day - I have no idea what I am doing but they seem to still be alive ;-) Andrew has started work on the next stage of garden planning - lifting all the grass at the side part and putting down slate chips and making some raised beds, to try and use up the ton of topsoil we have lying about!

Bedding Plants

Stage 1 of slate chipping!

The vegetable beds however are a bit disappointing. Lettuce is growing, and carrots are peeping out but Seb appears to have trampled everything else!! Every time he goes outside he runs straight to the vegetable beds, runs up and down before peeing on the lettuce. He just gravitates towards anything that is raised above the ground so we are thinking of ideas to deter him. Some sort of suspended netting might work while still allowing things to grow. Or perhaps an electric fence....

Found Seb on the bag of topsoil....no idea how he got up there!!

He also likes to sit on stones in the rockery

My presentation last week and today went well. I put a lot of work in to them both, especially the one for journal club today, so I was pleased with how they went. It did take me a good 10 minutes to work out that there was nothing on the screen because the projector wasn't in focus ;-) I am getting used to the full day and on the plus side it is less stressful and manic at work because I don't have to get everything done before I leave at lunch time. I don't really fancy doing it every day though haha.

Seb started his dog walking last week and apparently he got on ok. He went with the dog walker no problems but did bark in the van - the dogs are in crates though, which is not what he is used to. He got on fine with the other dogs though and seemed to enjoy himself. He was acting really strange when I came home after his first walk - he kept making this strange noise while looking at me then staring at the door as if trying to tell me that some strange lady came while i was out and took him away! He seemed fine today though and was quite chilled when I got home - this makes it a lot less stressful for me getting in from work and at least I know he is not being left for long periods. He is a sensitive wee thing after all.

On a final positive note - we are now over £17, 500 for Team Jac and I have not finished collecting team members sponsor money!! I am not sure when we will have the final total but it's sure to be amazing :-)

Flying towards £15,000....

So the Team Jac offline sponsorship is starting to come in and we are nearly at the £14,000 mark! I know we will definitely reach £15,000 because I am aware of some of the money still to be added. It is truly amazing that we have managed that from one event. It was worth all the planning, the sore legs and battling the elements on the day. I think it will be a few weeks before we have the absolute final total and I can't wait to see what it is!

I have had another really busy week, namely because I had taken on another three PBL sessions at the university. I have taken all those offered to me because the university is now on holiday for the Summer so I will not get any over the next few months. This is probably a good thing because it will give me a bit more breathing space, but money wise I will miss it! Although I am working as hard as I can just now, I still don't earn more than when i was off sick - due to the loss of most of my benefits. It is a strange system indeed but I would much rather have working lungs than money.... although I quite like the latter. Of course now I am able to get out and about, I am also able to spend it more! The uni work has been good though as I have been squireling it away to fund a wee summer holiday. We both have a week off in June and are looking for somewhere warm but with interesting things to do and see, while still being relaxing. I am not really into beach holidays and post transplant am not really supposed to lie about sunbathing (meant to wear sun block even in this country!) Andrews mum and dad have suggested Nice, which we are looking at.....but any ideas please leave a comment!

Since I have increased my work sessions I will be out two full days during the week, so we have been looking at dog walkers. Seb really can't be left for that long as he gets so bored and is visibly depressed when I get home! He mopes around harassing me to take him out, which is quite stressful when you are just in from work and trying to get dinner ready. Anyway, a local company was recommended to us and we had a meeting with them this week. It is run by two young women who both seemed very nice and to genuinely be interested in dogs. We are going to try them out - starting from next week, so that will be interesting! I am hoping he will walk in a group (it is cheaper!) but they never have more than 4-5 dogs together which doesn't seem too bad. I have no idea how he will react to this - he likes most dogs he meets but was quite overwhelmed at dog training, but there were about 15 dogs at that time. Hopefully he will behave and not show me up!

Thanks for the comments on my fancy dress photos - it appears most of you think I should go blonde ;-) I think hi lights are about as radical as I will get though! My hair is a nightmare just now because it has been falling out at a rate of noughts. I used to get this pre -transplant when I had a bad infection. Basically when you are very unwell all your hair stops growing at the same time (conserve energy) so around 3 months later it will start falling out at the same time, so it appears if you are losing tons of hair. This has been happening recently and I think it is related to being so unwell after the surgery in January. All the new hair is growing in underneath which is creating a nice wee spiky frizzy effect. Lovely. It is visibly thinner at the moment, although this could also be due to long term steroids. Hopefully it will settle down and be back to normal in a few months time. The steroids are annoying me at the moment because they are also making my skin bruise easily. I have bruised all up the inside of my arms and also lots on my legs. A few people have commented thinking I have had lots of attempts at taking blood. I did ask about getting my steroids reduced but the transplant team want to keep them at this dose for quite a while longer. I guess they keep me alive. That is rather useful.

Lastly, I have been spending a bit of time this week preparing a presentation for teaching next week. It is just teaching at the community resource centre I work in (we also have big teaching at the main hospital) so there will only be a handful of people there - but I always end up putting in way too much effort anyway. My mum has always said 'if a thing's worth doing, it's worth doing properly!' and that has always stuck in my mind. I am more or less finished my slides but need to start working on the case I have to present at Journal Club the following week! It has been a while since I presented anything but I don't really mind - it's just another excuse for me to talk non stop :-)

It is not too busy a weekend thank goodness. Tonight we are going to a charity race night which should be good fun and maybe I will even win something! The last organised race night I went to was shortly before my transplant - I had a horse called 'Puff-a-Long'! Oh how times have changed. Actually I was just looking over my blog posts from last May and I now realise I was probably quite manic. It was around this time I decided that I could carry a 5 litre watering can around the garden (repeatedly) despite the fact my breast bone had just been sawn open 3 weeks earlier. I thought it was entirely reasonable at the time! Luckily I have settled down a bit now but I still get a total buzz from being on the go most of the time - it's just the constant feeling that life is too short and I am going to pack as much in as possible. As long as I am enjoying myself then I think that is ok..

Busy Week

I was hoping for some well earned rest after the walk, but it has been a very busy week! Monday was supposed to be recovery day but unfortunately I had a hospital appointment mid day which was a bit annoying. It was just a dermatology review - you have an increased risk of skin cancer due to the immunosuppression drugs so they have to be careful about this. Everything was fine and I don't need to go back unless there are any problems. After that I had an interesting afternoon - recording a podcast for the student BMJ (British Medical Journal) about transplant. Apparently the journal are running a big transplant issue, covering various learning topics on this area for the students. A podcast is basically a recording the students can download to listen to. The BMJ editor had heard about me via a doctors forum who were sponsoring my walk and thought it would great to interview someone who had a transplant but was also a doctor. I think they also interviewed a live kidney donor and a transplant surgeon. I was talking for about an hour on the phone (directed by their questions) and they ran out of studio time haha! It will have to be condensed down so not sure what will be covered but hopefully I will sound ok and not 'too' scottish :-) I am not sure when it will be finished but will post a link if it's possible at the time.

Tuesday and Wednesday were very busy because those were my first two full days at work...for a long time! I got on fine and wasn't too tired at all - however I did feel quite stressed when I got home on Wednesday. It was the feeling of walking in the door, straight into the kitchen to start dinner with Seb po-going round me because he wanted a walk. Then I looked around and the house seemed really messy because I would normally have just cleared up in the afternoon as I went along. So in the time it took for my dinner to cook, I had flown round sweeping floors, dusting and cleaning and sent Andrew out to bring washing in and hoover. I felt like I couldn't sit down and relax with all that still to be done. I think it was mostly because I was meant to be working at the uni thurs and friday so just felt it was piling up. What I need to learn is that these things can wait, and it doesn't really matter if I am on top of things all the time. It's not even that I am a clean freak or obsessively tidy, but I do just feel so much calmer and happier when my surroundings are clutter free and clean. It's probably some control thing - especially when in the past I have had very little control over my life, especially health wise, so I tend to use external factors to gain that feeling. I probably need to try and let go of this.

In the end my Thursday uni teaching was cancelled so I had CF clinic in the morning (got on fine) and mum came through in the afternoon. We popped out to Debenhams to spend our vouchers - there wasn't much I really liked but funnily enough I managed to spend the vouchers anyway ;-)

Friday I was doing two PBL sessions at the uni so was there most of the day. It was a little boring because it was two different groups but the same scenario so I had to listen to the feedback on the same information twice. I probably learnt quite a lot though! It was about iron metabolism, which actually does tie in with a case presentation I have to do at work in a few weeks, so probably useful. I actually volunteered to present a case at journal club - I must be nuts! It was really because the case is interesting and I also did quite a bit of work on it before I went of sick two years ago - so would be good to finally present my findings before I leave this job in the summer.

The really exciting news from this week is that we have found drug company sponsorship for our CF booklet (CF and Relationships). I had sent out copies to all the CF units and one of the consultants took it to a conference to show the drug company - they loved it and immediately agreed to funding a run of thousands to be distributed to all CF units who wanted copies for their patients!!! They will hopefully also be able to take it along to the big North American CF conference this year, so I can say we are going global. Their sales team will handle the distribution so I don't even have to do anything. This is the best news for me and Em and has made all the hard work seem so much more worthwhile. We are already planning our next booklet - but it is top secret just now ;-)

Lastly, I was at my friend Gillian's 30th birthday last night - it was fancy dress (famous characters throughout the years - real or fiction). Myself and Andrew went as 'Bonnie and Clyde'. We dressed up based on the movie and fortunately everyone seemed to know who we were meant to be. I had to go blonde for the night which was most bizarre but also good fun! We didn't really know anyone else at the party because my other school friends couldn't make it - but I just sat with some of Gillian's teacher friends and chatted to them. It didn't stop me dancing either and we had a lovely night. I will leave you with some photos....

Me and the Birthday Girl (Marie Antoinette)

Andrew and Gillian

Looking strangely gleeful about holding a gun

Fay Dunaway eat your heart out...