Up The Farway Tree

 Round 2

After my last blog I did start to feel gradually better following the infection.  It was nice to have a few days of feeling more like myself.  It was a busy week with a number of different hospital appointments, which was tiring.   I found during the hospital admission my hair had started rapidly falling out and by last week it was only straggly and awful looking.  I decided it would be better just to get Andrew to shave it off - yes, that's how much I trust him!   We snipped it short then used the electric hair trimmer to shave the rest.  It was a strange experience - I was ok at the start, became emotional mid way then felt better after it was done.  It actually didn't look as bad as I expected and my head was also not as big as I thought it was haha!  It felt a bit tender afterwards but feels fine now.  I also noticed how chilly it can be without hair!  Estelle was there for the process (at her choice) as I felt it was better for her to be involved and see what was happening, rather than getting a shock seeing it all gone.  We had been discussing it a lot in the lead up and she had been helping me choose scarfs and hats.   She also has grasped the concept that the chemo is killing the cancer cells but at same time has killed the hair cells, so she has a good understanding.  She mostly thought it was quite hilarious and said I looked like a cute wee troll!  She also took great delight in shouting "night night baldy!" on her way to bed.  In the house I am not bothering wearing scarfs etc as I might as well be comfortable!  I have now received an NHS wigs to try but following chemo haven't had a chance to try it properly.  It looks very like my hair colour and style but I need to get it sitting in the correct parting, which is proving trickier than I thought. It's a shame I can't just go into the hair dresser and let them sort it.

After pre assessment clinic last week it was decided that my 2nd chemo would go ahead as planned.  This was as a day patient, so much better than having to stay in hospital.   The day unit was nice, with individual rooms and comfy big recliner chairs to sit on.   The rituxemab could go quicker this time (as had no reactions last time) so only took an hour, then I had the rest of the chemo.  I had a clinic appointment at 10.30am before chemo, so was actually there until 5pm, so was a very long day.  However I passed the time easily with netflix and a chat with my friend Nicola who works at the Beatson (very handy!)   We had a bit of trouble finding a vein but managed in the end - I hope they hold out for the following sessions!

This time I felt more prepared for the side effects.  I have been using both anti sickness on regular basis and although felt really quite nauseated the first 2 days, it does seem to be easing now.  My mouth hasn't been as sore as last time (as of yet!) although unfortunately my taste is altered, so everything tastes a bit weird!  This is making eating more of a chore but I have increased my supplements after losing weight during last admission.  I start the injections to boost white cell at end of week and am not looking forward to the bone pain - I am hoping that last time some of that was due to infection. Overall I feel I am coping better this time round, so hope that continues!

I will be getting a CT scan at end of week to see if nodes have started responding to treatment, although not sure if that will be reported before my next chemo.  I know I will be very nervous getting the results but am trying not to think about it just now.

In other ways life continues as usual! Estelle enjoyed her October break even though we couldn't go anywhere other than the park.  She is actually very easily pleased though and loves being outdoors!  She also loves crafts and drawing, so I was able to do some Halloween crafts - we painted conkers to make Halloween decorations and she loves if I will sit and draw with her.   I am also trying to do some crafts to keep my mind occupied - although finding my dexterity is a bit off so the outcomes are variable.

My next chemo will be 6th November so I will just focus on getting to that point in one piece and hopefully avoid any admissions before then!  Thank you for all the kind messages I have been receiving - it really does help keep me going!